“I’m Dreaming Of A…” well it wasn’t a White Christmas!

I believe a person’s dreams mean something; otherwise they wouldn’t be having them. If you’ve been reading my blog you’ll know that about me, as I’ve mentioned this many times. They fall into many different categories: Dreams of memories past, premonitions of things to come, uh-oh dreams that are showing you patterns and similarities in something that is occurring in your present life that is strikingly familiar to something or someone from your past—these are wake-your-ass-up-and-take-notice dreams. Whimsical, light, almost fairy-tale like dreams to perhaps wake up your inner-child if you’ve become too stuck in the ‘real’ world; nightmares and terrors as a reflection of the emotional ‘dark’ place your mind is in. I’m not an expert in this area, have no real knowledge of dream interpretation, but usually have a pretty good idea what mine mean and why they are occurring. Well, until lately.

I’ve read that we all dream every night, and I’m sure I’m no different. I’ve always just figured that the ones I can’t remember can’t be that important, and the ones I do I’d better take notice of. I’ve been remembering quite a few lately, and have really been trying to decipher the meaning behind them. I admit parts have me stumped. Anyway, I thought I’d share last night’s crazy dream with all of you. It was several dreams with different themes that seemed to merge into one, enough to make me feel that they all have something in common.

The first part I don’t recall any details of, just that much like a ghost limb I can still feel the sensation of it being there. The next part began with me standing in the center of a remote town with dirt streets, dressed in women’s Middle Eastern attire (I looked it up and think it’s called an Abayah), instinctively knowing I was in Bangladesh, had lost all my money, credit cards, belongings, was supposed to meet my husband there, and couldn’t find him. I was looking around at the women and men dressed in similar attire moving to and fro, didn’t know how to speak to them, didn’t know what to do about my dilemma, and was getting frightened about what the night would bring because it was already dusk and I hadn’t a plan. I finally got a man to speak to me and asked him how to get to the nearest town where perhaps my husband was. He told me there are only two roads, one leading in and one leading out, so I’d have to go in the opposite direction from which I came. I followed the road with my eyes out of the small town and seen that it dissipated into a dark desert and had no end. There I was in the dark, in the middle of nowhere, not knowing exactly where I was going if I were to try and walk. The thought occurred to me that this might be dangerous; anyone could pick me up on that road and hurt me if they wanted, but then I suddenly had this overwhelming feeling come over me that I didn’t care. I wasn’t afraid. I knew if I had to I wouldn’t be afraid to do it. I did ask the man if there was anyone going out of town that might be able to give me a ride, but don’t recall how that ended. I only know that my dream skipped—or I just don’t remember…

Suddenly I was in a similar town (or could’ve been the same one for all I know) and my husband was present. He was also dressed in a long robe, but it seemed to be more of a cloak he wore with the hood up. You could see the front of his hairline, his eyes, his goatee, and the sides of his long hair hanging down the front of it (reminding me of how Jesus is depicted). He seemed very familiar with the surroundings as if he’d been there for a while. I just remember the relief I felt by his presence and knowing that I was no longer alone. We were just wandering through the street, occasionally turning to look at this or that, and my keeping as close as possible to him. Something seemed to catch his eye, he turned away with his back to me, and when he turned around it was no longer my husbands face, but my ex-fiancé’s. Strangely, it didn’t strike me as odd until after I awoke. In my dream it was as if he were still my husband.

The dream shifts again, I’m no longer in another country but our own. My husband is again in the dream, and I’m looking at a wedding ring set that he’d just given me that apparently was the replacement for my original set I thought was lost. While looking at it I began to notice how cheaply it was made, and that the intricate detailing on the band of the engagement ring was breaking loose and sticking up, much like the screen on a woman’s electric razor does when it needs replaced. I stand there holding it with one hand, then suddenly look over at the other and see I’m also holding my old set. I start comparing the difference in quality and began to feel deep disappointment and shame that he didn’t think I was worth buying a decent set for. Then this dream seems to fog and disappear and another begins.

Second dream, stranger yet. I was in what I knew to be my sister’s basement (though in reality it looks nothing like that) with my children who were still young; my two, grown children were elementary school age. In the dream I knew that this basement was where we were going to have to make temporary residence and was talking to them about cleaning it up, and rearranging some of the old furniture that was already down there. The basement was carpeted except for one particular square spot—one side of which was the wall—the size of a very large area rug. I was debating on how to arrange the furniture around this square and place a coffee table in the middle of it to try and disguise the empty space so it wouldn’t look that bad, but remember feeling so disappointed that the living room set had this old, somewhat-velvet upholstery, with clusters of flowers and foliage in dark, earth tones on it (something you would find in the 70’s perhaps), and how I wished I had my own beautiful set to spruce up our living quarters.

The dream jumps again, but I am in the same basement. Now there are other people I know down there, some family members, and we’re going through someone’s personal items (I have no idea whose), and know that we’re not prying in doing so, but it’s something that’s required of us. I come across an old card (could be congratulations, birthday, anniversary, whatever…), open it up and find money tucked inside. For a moment I look around to see if anyone is looking because I want to take it, but upon realizing that my sister-in-law from my first marriage is standing next to me, I don’t.

Now the dream moves again and I’m with a man in the same vicinity. He seems to live next door to my sister’s house. I can tell we have a relationship by how he keeps close to me and is attentive. I feel strangely odd as if I’m unsure about the relationship. He asks me if I’m going to stay over and I tell him sure, knowing if I do I will have to slip out when he goes to work in the morning or I’ll end up having to walk down the hall and run into his mother after she wakes. Next we’re lying in what I know to be his bed in a small room. I’m on the right side of the bed with covers drawn up and under my armpits so my breasts aren’t exposed. He’s on the left, lying on his side, propped on an elbow facing me, and we’re having what he deems is a serious discussion. I can tell he loves me, I can tell he’s patient with me but it’s getting difficult for him, and he’s asking me to make a decision where our relationship is concerned. He keeps trying to reassure me with his words of how he feels about me, and I know he means it, but I still feel hesitation. He has a nice face. Not just attractive, but almost likeable (as silly as that sounds). Still I’m unsure, and my eyes keeping moving from his to the sheets while he’s speaking. The sheets are a very deep, vivid blue, with tiny white stars scattered all over them like a starry night in the country; so minute you have to strain to see the detail of them. They look so patriotic, I’m confused why he would pick sheets like this, and have a hard time focusing on what he’s saying to me. The dream ends.

A few things to note about this dream and why I’m confused:  (1) I’m geographically stupid about foreign countries, unless it’s a place that interests me and I choose to do a little online research about it. Bangladesh is not one of them. This place never crosses my mind, I know nothing of it—including where it even is—and certainly have no clue how they dress there. I have no idea how this particular place ended up in my dream. (2) I have no idea why my current husband keeps turning into my ex-fiancé (this occurs nearly every time I dream of one or the other). Yes, there are similarities in the way they both look—or I should say my husband slightly resembles my ex-fiancé when he was younger and I was still with him: Same height, weight, long straight hair with goatee, attractive, etc… The closest thing I can come up with is that my ex has been on my mind (for obvious reasons I’ve discussed in previous posts), I’ve been very unhappy and frustrated lately with things currently going on in my marriage, and frankly I’m beginning to think the both of them are arrogant, selfish jerks (which might also explain part of the ring thing). (3) Living in my sister’s basement does make some sense. I did stay with her for a couple months last winter when I was debating on leaving my husband for good, and lately have again been thinking about selling my most prized, antiques and using the money to move on if things don’t change. I just don’t have a clue where my children fit in though, and why they are with me and so much younger. (4) I absolutely, positively, do not steal! I mean, EVER! I’m the lady at the grocery store that will give back the extra money when the cashier makes a mistake. I was the bartender that tucked money back into the pockets of drunks when it fell out as they were leaving the bar. I believe the Bible when it says God will take seven times as much away from you as what you knowingly steal from another. I’ve always figured I don’t have that much to lose, so I’d better not even go there. So where in the hell did the desire to steal money from a card come from? (4) I don’t, and won’t date grown men who still have to live with mommy (although that part of the dream did strike a chord with me, because my first husband and I got together when we were still both very young, I used to spend the night with him, and then creep out in the morning…and many times got ‘caught’ by his mother). (5) The guy in the last part of the dream seemed so familiar to me when I woke up, that I started racking my brain to figure out where I’d seen him before, and upon finally remembering the movie he was in got on IMDB and looked him up. It’s the actor, John Corbett from “My Big Fat Greek Wedding! What? Okay, I could probably understand it if it were Brad Pitt who I reeeeally had the hots for until I found out he was a cheating, piece of shit… Simon Baker from “The Mentalist”, because he’s just a yummy, piece of candy… and don’t wince, but yes…the one and only Stephen King, because frankly I find his brilliantly dark, scary mind makes him incredibly sexy in a twisted way…and I’d do him without hesitation! All of these I’d consider; but John Corbett? Although I admit, after studying his face I could see why I would find it so likeable, and yeah…I’d probably give up the bootie to him. (6) The vivid-blue, starry, patriotic sheets? I can’t even begin to find a limb to go out on with that one.

My mind is turning into a theatre with numerous plays being held with no particular genre in mind. Confusing me as I sleep, and playing with my mind all day in the waking hours. I’m a bit unsettled by it. If you happened to make it through all of this lengthy post, know anything about dream interpretation; please feel free to give your opinion. It would be more than welcomed.

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