“I’d Like To Return This, Thank you.”Posted: April 28, 2011
Today is my anniversary. “Blah..blah..blah..”
I thought I’d take a siesta from my pc today, spruce up the joint a little, and have a ‘me’ day (facial, manicure, pedicure, etc). Yeah, okay…cause when was the last time I was allowed a good day?
I started arguing with my husband last night. He’s pissed about the well (problem isn’t the jet pump after all), and pissed off that my son doesn’t do more around here. This morning I got to argue with my son before he left for school. Yippee for me! Way to start my day!!
Son: “Why’s he mad? I didn’t do anything.”
Me: “Exactly. That’s why he’s mad.”
Me: “Because you don’t do any-thing.”
Son: “Well, what am I supposed to do.”
Me: “Whatever we ask.” Now I’m getting pissy. “You don’t have any designated chores, we cut you tons of slack and let you run, still all you want to do is sit on the phone with your girlfriend when you’re home, and we gotta pull teeth to get you to help out. I mean, how hard is it to let the dog out?”
Son: “I don’t like to take the dog out.”
Me: “I don’t either, but I do it.”
Son: “I shouldn’t have to. It’s not my dog it’s his. I didn’t ask for it, I don’t want it, why should I have to help take care of it?”
Me: “Really? I’m sure he feels the same sometimes too, but he does it.”
Me: “You’re not his ‘real’ son. He didn’t ask for you. I’m sure there are times he wishes he didn’t have the responsibility, but still he helps take care of you.”
Son: “And I respect him more than my own dad. Even more than you, because you yell at me all the time.” Now I can see his little mind going to work as he’s giving thought to something. “Besides, you should be doing it. His job is going to work, mine is school, and yours is supposed to be the house.”
Now this isn’t the first time he’s gone there. Yes, believe it or not he’s still around to talk about the last ‘episode’! Honestly, I can’t believe he’s brave enough to try and go there again! I just kept thinking to myself as I’m biting my tongue, OH, NO HE DIDN’T! OH, NO HE DIDN’T! Oh, but yes he had. Brave little fucker, isn’t he? He needs to be especially nice to me right now, because my patience and tolerance for men and their shit is at an all time low, and he’s a mere six months from his 18th birthday. He may wind up out on his ear the following day if he’s not careful!
I don’t know what’s happened to me. My two older children would’ve never thought of getting away with that shit, and wouldn’t have. I was the mother that raised them with an iron fist. The same one who informed them the first time they came home and told me that I couldn’t spank them because it was against the law and I would go to jail, that I would beat their asses if I damn well pleased. I told them that the cops could take me to jail and put them in foster care. I’d get bailed out and would not be attending the required parenting classes to get them back. “I can love you ANYWHERE you are! Makes no difference to me whether you’re with me or not.” Oh, they knew! My kids aren’t perfect, and my oldest has made some reeeeally bad choices (which is why he’s where he is), but I never had to worry about either of them raising a hand to hit me, or any of that shit that other parents had to put up with. I would’ve knocked the snot out of them if they’d tried. So why am I such a softie now?
Anyway, to hell with both of them! I don’t care if a damn thing gets done around here today, and I look like the ‘bitter, old hag’ I’m becoming when they both get home. I AM SICK..SICK..SICK..OF THEIR SHIT! Instead, I decided to jump on here and spend the morning with some of you. It’s pretty sad when you begin to prefer your cyber-life over your real one, isn’t it?
Wouldn’t it be great if you could exchange your family like you can a bad purchase?
Customer Service Clerk: “What’s the matter.”
Me: “It’s not a good fit.”
CSC: “We don’t give refunds, only store credit.”
Me: “I’ll take it!”