Does This Make Us Any Better Than In-Bred’s?Posted: June 25, 2011
First of all, let me just say Picky, Picky, Picky. Oh yeah…where’s the love when Pissy screws up and can’t download the photo’s properly? I get on here after entertaining company the last couple of days, and what do I find? Cyber snickering….that’s what! Shame on all of you. What was it that confused you and made you think I was purrrfect and above error? My catty attitude? The way my fur rises when I get angry? The way my claws extend when I’m preparing myself for an altercation? The movement of my delicate whiskers when I’m wrinkling my nose in distaste? I’d think all these things should forewarn you that Pissy hits the catnip and isn’t capable of doing even the most mundane simple tasks at times. I smell shit in my litter box!
Actually, although I haven’t yet had the chance to reply to comments I’ve already read, you people had me laughing my ass off. My son looked at me strangely and asked “What’s so funny?” as he came over to the pc to look for himself. I read him some of the comments, and he wanted to know what pics you all were talking about, so I scrolled up the post for him to see. He looked at me strangely again and said “I don’t get it.” You want to know why he didn’t get it? The photo’s all appear on my post. Weird, huh? I’m telling ya, my pc is possessed.
Well, I’m once again incredibly behind on my posts and emails. Thursday I was busy cleaning house, getting laundry done, and preparing a birthday cake for my son’s girlfriend (I only did the homemade frosting. My 17 year old son insisted on baking her the cake himself. Isn’t that sweet? Ahhh…). We celebrated it with dinner together after the hubby got home. She’s such a little doll. Is it okay for me to like her more than I do my boy? She smells better. Then after the hubby went and picked up my cousin who’s in from Florida on vacation and has been staying with my sister, and brought her out here for a couple of days. Due to the risk of flooding in the city all of them might have to evacuate, and so the one sister my cousin had been staying with panicked and decided to leave early, and the two of them retreated to her daughters in the country not far from here. The problem is they have a large family anyway, and other friends and relatives that had already left their homes are staying there, so when speaking with my cousin on the phone she whispered that she was miserable and rubbing elbows with 23 people. What? 23 fucking people are in that house! She told me that she didn’t know how much more she could take, because she’s never had to live like that–Who has? That’s freaking craziness!–so I told her she could come over here for a couple/few days and stay with us where it’s quiet. I’m glad she did. We were able to visit and get caught up on A LOT OF THINGS.
Now before any of you starts wondering why my husband and I haven’t jumped in to offer lodging in our over 2700 square foot house that currently has 3 occupants and a few animals, the reason is because my husband says ABSOLUTELY NOT! We did make mention to my one sister and her husband that if they needed to come out that they are more than welcome, and if push-comes-to-shove and an evacuation is absolutely necessary I will ask my other sister to stay here too, but my husband can only take people–especially my one sister–in wee doses and says he’s not even going to get started with that whole mess. I can’t blame him. I, too, can only take family and friends in small doses. Apparently the one sister decided that all those people were even too much for her, and that perhaps her retreat to the country was a hasty decision, so she went back home to await further instructions, and my husband dropped the cousin back off at her house this morning. Right now I am alone. Blissfully alone. San’s hubby, son, and company. Ahhhh….
Okay, put on your seat belts fellow WordPress Co-pilots. Pissy has news. As if my family saga doesn’t already have enough juicy tidbits of information for me to fill a novel with nail-biting, edge-of-your-seat, page-turners, it appears I have yet another detail to add to our obviously dysfunctional family history. What in the hell were these people thinking? I truly belong to this family? Perhaps I should explain…. Follow along closely. I shall not repeat it.
The cousin that came to visit me is the daughter of my mother’s oldest sister that lived in Florida where my mother originated from. This cousin is several years older than my oldest sister. Still following me? I hadn’t seen her since I was about 4 years old, because we seldom made the trek to Florida, which means it’s been 44 years since I’ve laid eyes on her. Which means I’d forgotten completely what she looks like. What….more accurately who she looks like is my mother. No, I don’t mean she resembles her. I mean she looks EXACTLY like my mother did in her thirties and forties. Okay, you know I fucking freaked; for one because my mother is dead and it was like seeing her resurrected, for another there’s no denying something is seriously a foul in our family.
Now the first question I asked is “What the hell is going on here? You look just like my mom!” And I had reason to be suspicious, because my mother does not look anything like her oldest sister, who is supposed to be the mother of my cousin. Well, to make a very long story short, it appears my cousin was told at some point that my mother was her mother, by her father before he passed away. She only had his word to go on it though, and really didn’t look into it any further. The story he told her was that it was before my mother married my father, she was single, couldn’t take care of the baby, and gave it to her sister to raise as her own. I think my cousin came up here seeking answers, and from the bomb she dropped on me this weekend, apparently before my father passed away he admitted to my brother the secret that mom had confessed to him that she was actually her daughter. My brother told me nothing of this. I’m not sure if I should be pissed or not. So it appears people that I have a sister that I always thought was my cousin, and now at the age of 48 I have to start rethinking my family tree again. Given the fact that I’m still unsure if the rumors about me are true or not, and whether my father is my real father or not, this new little added detail makes me think that we’re really no better than a bunch of in-bred uncivilized folk. Feel me? Pissy is going to have one helluva bestseller on her hands if she ever gets her ass motivated and finishes this damn book. The dysfunction in my family never ends.
Well, I suppose I should leave you all with that little bit of info to chew on. The rain finally stopped falling, the sun has come out, and I might fore-go reading blogs for yet a little while longer so I can bask in the sunshine for a while.
Hugs and kisses to you all!