Good news! My Dell tower is currently in the hands of someone that is going to get it up and running again, rid it of all the little bugs it may have, and as my husband puts it is getting tweaked. Tweaking sounds good. I can work with tweaking! The computer, guys. Just the computer. Focus!
My excitement stems from the fact that this computer I have been working off of since I believe January right after the other took a dump, is well…a piece of shit! Not only a piece of shit, but one that is old and bogged down with more crap than you can imagine. That, and being the little computer genius that my husband always tells me I am–for no other reason than I can actually get into the control panel deleting files and he knows nothing beyond surfing the internet–I went into the control panel, and hoping to clear out some stuff I really don’t use somehow completely deleted…and I do mean completely deleted my office program. I literally have no where to do my writing now. I have no way to open my files. Not freaking funny, guys! Oh yeah, I might also mention that I have no disk to download the program back into the computer. Ugh! So you see, this excitement is absolutely founded.
Now there is but one problem at having my Dell worked on. Okay, maybe a couple. The first would be that I’m going on my husband’s word that his buddy from work who is fixing it is a computer wizard capable of fixing just anything. Remember, my husband is the same who thought this genius could do anything and she managed to wipe out her Word! The other–and this one makes me real nervous–is that if he is able to get it up and running how do I know he’s not going to start reading all my shit? My personal journal is on that thing. And no, I never bothered locking any private information behind a password because my son only used the computer for Facebook, and my husband couldn’t figure out how to go into ‘Start’ and open shit if he tried. It really makes me uncomfortable to think this strange man could be looking at all my old plans for reinventing myself and divorcing my husband. Old plans? Anyway, you get my drift.
Having my Dell up and running means I can get those barn pics posted for all of you. That, and perhaps I will be able to take some additional pics of my hovel so that all of you can enjoy a slice of Pissy’s life. Make sure you eat fast. The fruit is going bad. And more importantly, I will once again be able to resume working on my manuscript which is stuck inside the motherboard somewhere. It’s really sucked writing on legal pads, especially when I can’t even remember where I left off. So hopefully life will get a little easier in the future, and Pissy will be a little happier. And you know…it’s all about making Pissy comfortable and happy!
Moving on…..Remember yesterday’s post? Where the theme was all about the things in your past that shape you? You didn’t read it? Get back there…I’ll wait. Well, I was reading my horoscope today by Jonathan Cainer and it was like he’d been reading my mind. I thought I’d share it with you.
Life is not a series of unconnected events. What you did in the past has fashioned the way you are today. What you do today is creating your future. With that in mind, the planets are presently asking you to focus on the change you may be able to bring about next. To do this you may have to think more deeply about what various sensitive situations and significant people mean to you. You’re letting a fear or a resentment hold you back. Overcome it. Not only will doing this shape your future, it will help redefine who you are.
Fear or resentment. Hmm.. Not that any of this spooky shit may actually hold it’s weight in water, but there might be a ring of truth to it. Fear of moving forward and taking a chance on my writing, makes sense. Resentment I carry for the back-stabbing traitors who turned me overnight into the bitter bitch that I’ve now become…that makes sense too. Question is, how to let go of the fear and resentment?
Okay, so I know I’m all over the place in this post–don’t act like you’re shocked, this is me we’re talking about, remember?–but I happened to catch a seriously-old rerun of Unsolved Mysteries last night that made me sit and think for a bit. Yes, I do that occasionally! In it a woman was looking for her husband–whom she claimed was the love of her life–who had disappeared one day and never returned. She never knew what happened, she needed answers. To make a long story short, they found him living in Key West. Key West! He claims he had been jumped, had a head injury, and suffered from complete amnesia after…and you know just wandered off to Key West! Only after seeing pics of himself on the show did he contact someone and let them know he was alive. Happy endings…. Not so fast. The end of the episode showed him going to see her, she had tried to jog his memory by taking him to certain places, nothing worked, and the trip served to give her the closure she needed and he returned to the life he’d made for himself in… yes…Key West!
Is it me? Am I completely jaded and cynical where love and happy-ever-after is concerned, or does his story smell like marine life to the rest of you too? Here’s what I think: He never got jumped, there was no head injury, he never suffered from amnesia, and the only reason he came forward is he figured someone would recognize him from the show after it aired and thought it best to get shit out in the open…well sort of. The amnesia and playing dumb was a nice touch. “Way to not have to take responsibility for your actions and wanting to bail on your wife!” I only say this because I myself have spent years dreaming of the perfect way to escape my life and trying to find the best way to reinvent myself after doing so. And…Key West was where I would want to go. He was living in Key West guys. I mean, come on! It’s not like he hit his head and wandered to Ohio, or some shit! So anyway, I guess it will come as no surprise that coming down with amnesia and just wandering off is starting to cross my mind. What’s the worse that could happen? Getting caught and having to play dumb? Ha…ha… I do that already.