Pissy’s Priorities and Pics of the Litterbox

Yesterday’s post showed little activity and received few responses. This has been the case lately, and I was prepared for that. I mentioned that this is the kind of thing that happens when you push yourself away from the pc and make the decision to have a life, and it has. I spend hours on the computer each day as it is: I sort through notifications of posts in my emails, comments, and messages left for me. I try to hit some of the subscriptions that I hadn’t gotten to in previous days, stop by some that subscribe to me, and others that popped by to take a peek/see. I respond to comments left for me, and personal emails.I try to write a post of my own. Most often I don’t, because I don’t have time. I try to work on my manuscript. Most often I can’t, because my brain is fried. It got to the point that I was no longer sitting outside breathing in beautiful days, reading books, crocheting, sewing, or trying out new, complicated recipes. I didn’t have much of a life before blogging, but what few interests I did have were slowly dwindling away. I was addicted.

I don’t have a Facebook account–I did, hated it, and shut it down two weeks into it–don’t Twitter; have no time to go through WordPress anymore reading random blogs in order to stir up interest and activity for my blog. I honestly don’t mind that I no longer can’t. I’ve accepted that mine will never be the blog that receives hundreds of hits or dozens of comments per day. Personally, I think the reason few people leave comments is because they fear just what kind of reply will spill forth from a head that has no filter on it’s thoughts. Ha..ha.. Especially when the topic concerns relationships, you throw my best friend, Pandora Patty, into the mix, and the rest of the women get wound up. My blog will always be simmering and never full boil, because I can’t/won’t turn up the heat anymore. I have a competitive nature, and it used to bother me, because I felt I had to do and be more. I was a gerbil trying to conquer the wheel by keeping it spinning. 

I got to thinking about this when Sully was sick and I took time away from blogging. I couldn’t write, didn’t feel like having human interaction, so I was forced to find this and that to distract me every day from the impending doom that enveloped me from his gradual demise from cancer. It occurred to me one day while doing these things that I really enjoyed them and realized how much I missed them. How much I was sacrificing. 

Winter is quickly approaching and with it the bitter cold that prohibits me from playing outside. I’ll no longer be able to take my coffee out in the morning, watch the sunrise, feel the cool breeze on my face; allowing my mind to wander and be inspired as I take in the view and write. I’ll have less reasons to be outside, and more why I should sit in and blog: A fire in the hearth warming my back as I peruse all your thoughts on the holidays, experiences you’re having, and gaze at the beautiful photo’s you’re taking of white landscapes. I suppose this is why Winter is a better time to blog for me than Fall, and reasons why you may hear from me less at times. Those and these……

The sun taking a peek over the cornfields.
Slowly the sun rises.
A glorious day begins.
View of backyard NorthWest.
Swing near Sully's final resting place.
View of backyard North.
View of barn NorthEast.
View to the South.
West side of the front yard.
The road less traveled. Umm...literally for me.

I don’t have a laptop. In a perfect world. Until I do and can blog from it outside, I’d much rather be looking at this during the day then my pc screen. Perhaps not paradise for everyone, but nirvana for me. Us country folk don’t want or require a lot. Pissy had to push away a little and get her priorities straight. I had to remind myself that what may work for some of you, won’t necessarily work for me. That’s okay though. That’s why it’s called PISSY’S Litterbox. You know…all about me! 

I just wonder….what moves you? Is your scale properly balanced? Hmm…?

26 thoughts on “Pissy’s Priorities and Pics of the Litterbox

  1. Girl! You need to friggin call me! yES, i HOPE YOUR CAR GETS FIXED…BUT…he could have fixed it all along? No. NO. NO NO NO! You are worth better than that! This should have been fixed a long time ago! He is trying to keep you fixed, under false pretenses…no no no! You are not stupid! Heartfelt, deep, atatched. Not stupid! Limits have been met…. I see Thelma and Louise in our futures!

    1. Umm…Thelma and Louise died. Ha..ha.. Although they did have the right idea before the whole murder, mayhem, going-over-the-cliff thing.
      Oh, I’m aware that he’s had more than enough time to rise to the occasion and help me. I’m not happy, nor very forgiving that I’ve had to do without so long. But I’m trying to stay positive, and be thankful that he is finally working on it, and that I should have my wheels under me here real soon. After, I don’t know what the future holds for me. I might find with a bit of independence I don’t need to leave. Or I might find that North Carolina is calling me. Either way I just want to be happy again. It’s been so long since I’ve had peace in my life. You’re a doll for worrying about me though! And as usual you just crack me the hell up. 😉

  2. Hey Pissy, you really let it rip here! I know the feeling, you have something to say and you see hits are minimal and you think “why do I bother?” But then, I realised that I was checking comments daily too and it does get a bit time consuming and by the time you’re done, you don’t feel creative & like writing any more. Now what I do is I write when I turn on the PC (I don’t go straight to comments or wordpress). I only go to comments and wordpress occasionally, IF I have spare time at the end of writing. Chin up, Kitty, you’ve clearly got a bunch of followers so what you do is quality. It’s good you had time out, though to care for someone sick, and it’s SUPER good you recognise what you need. Stay well 🙂 I’ll put you on my blogroll 🙂

    1. That’s a really good idea to write a post before bothering to do anything else. I guess that’s where that damn guilt used to come in; I always worried about others before I did myself. I’m getting much better about that.
      I hope you didn’t get the wrong impression; it’s the fact that I’m not worried about the hits anymore that’s the real beauty of it. It was worrying about them, and trying to keep my blog rolling along as fast as everyone else’s, that was making me crazy. When you preoccupy yourself with that then the content loses substance. For me, the whole purpose of this blog was to free my mind and find healing, find friendship, and hone my writing skills. Not try and make my numbers jump. So I’m going to use my blog for what it was originally intended for, have a life on the side, and let the chips fall where they may. But I do appreciate the blogroll head’s up. That was nice. Thanks.

  3. Beautiful photo’s! I’m sure that although they are stunning, you look at them and still feel that they do not do the view justice, thank you for sharing them.

    And just so you know, your blog, the time you took to respond to my emails, inspired me. I feel braver after reading your words. 🙂 x

    1. Thank you! That is so sweet of you to say that. 🙂
      I think that truly is the reason most of us continue to move the wheel, is those moments when we feel that someone actually benefited from something we wrote. Those make the effort worth it. I know that everyone has touched my life in one way or another. Some I related to more than others, but each at one time or another has shared something that ‘moved’ me. I know if it were not for all of you, I wouldn’t be as emotionally healthy as I am today. All of you are the grease that moves my wheel. Thank you!

  4. What a truly beautiful spot you live in. And I so love that you chose dawn (my favourite time) to start the photo montage with.
    Balance? Hah, de hah hah. My days are spent on a see saw (I think you call them teeter totters) and there is mud at either end.
    Take care of yourself. We will be here when you are ready to return.

    1. Oh, I’m not going anywhere. I’m just going to practice a little something called ‘moderation’. I believe it’s possible to have that, and am looking for it. I’m going to start giving ‘less’ to this blog and more to my real life…whatever that may entail. I don’t feel complete when I’m over indulging in one thing and wind up lopsided. Just can’t do that no more.
      I like our little acreage too. It may not be fancy, and the house may be in dire need of repairs, but we bought the view and it’s more than paid itself off. The only thing I would change outside if I could, is I’d have more flowers. I don’t know why, but I don’t have a green thumb and can’t grow shit! I’m glad you like the pics though. Sharing part of my life with you guys makes me feel closer to you. It’s not geography but emotion that counts. 🙂

  5. Those photos are wonderful, especially the sunrise, and what a glorious view! I love the wide open places where there’s lots of breathing room.

    DH and I just returned last night from a trip to spend our Canadian Thanksgiving with family, so I’m just catching up with my blogging friends today.

    You’re so very smart not to become a slave to your blog! I think readers like to count on a regular post, but that doesn’t mean it has to be a daily one unless that works for you. (I couldn’t do daily!) They’ll keep coming back as long as they have an idea of when to expect something. I like WordPress’s “schedule” option because sometimes I spend time writing a week’s worth of posts all at once, and schedule them in advance to post on specific dates. Although my blog is mostly writing-related, I haven’t limited myself, despite having someone suggest I should (to attract readers with specific interests) because sometimes I just want to share something that has occurred to me.

    Blogging is a good way to practice your writing skills. From what I see, you’re a great writer… able to express your thoughts really well, and what you post here is a reflection of you and your interests and/or thoughts. But whether you post once a day, once or twice a week, or once a month isn’t as important as giving yourself opportunities for refueling and letting folks know when to look for your return.

    1. I’ve never used the ‘schedule’ option. Perhaps I should try that.
      I have no intention of being gone for long duration’s at a time. I’m just seeking some moderation so that it doesn’t interfere with my daily life anymore. I suspect I might blog a couple/few times a week, and use a couple of hours on my off days to read blogs, etc. Honestly, I’m just not that interested in generated more traffic on my blog anymore. When I begin to worry about that my blog actually suffers.
      I love our view. And as I’ve said before, it’s the view we bought more than anything. It’s the view that inspires me most days, calms my nerves when I’m unraveling, and soothes me when I’m upset. My little piece of the world that I wanted to share with all of you.

    1. It’s amazing how easy it is to get so immersed in this damn thing that the hours literally fly by and your day is practically gone. I just don’t want to do that anymore. I’m going to invest a couple of hours here and there, and the rest I’m going to put into the other interests I have…including going out and actually enjoying the fresh air. I don’t do nearly enough of that anymore, winter is closing in fast, and I need to cram in some great days.

    1. Thanks, Renee! It’s just an old farmhouse that sits on five acres, and probably isn’t much compared to some properties out there, but I’ve always seen potential in it and adore the view, so it works for me. And I gotta admit, it does have a million dollar view. 😉 I’ve never taken that for granted.

    1. Thanks Babe! Well, I hope you got out and enjoyed some of your day. It started raining here, dammit! I made up for it though; I made a big pan of lasagna, swilled down a bottle of wine, actually watched some television, and kept my paws off the computer all evening. It felt so good to say “NO!” Moderation is the key.

  6. Comments will come and go, don’t let that discourage you. Write when you can, read when you can. It’s suppose too be fun and therapeutic. Your devoted followers will continue to read and comment.

    Bren @ Four-Legged Mom
    Previously Just Bren

    1. Oh hell, I don’t let that bother me anymore. I admit, I did there for a while when I was trying to ‘keep up with the Jones’, but I finally decided that the blog would suffer more if I pushed myself than not. Trying to run a race that doesn’t exist is futile. And I don’t really think for me it’s about readers anymore, but rather friendships I’ve made through my blog. Whether anyone reads my stuff or not, I know where to find my friends when I want to stop and say ‘Hi’. You can run but you can’t hide. Ha..ha..

    1. Thank you. I thought everyone would especially enjoy the sunrise. We have the most magnificent sunrise’s here that I’ve ever experienced, and a pretty terrific view too. I’m glad you enjoyed them. 🙂

  7. Balanced? Let’s not start the day with histerical, maniacal laughter, shall we?

    I’ve not written in over a week, 9 days, or been reading blogs. Just so blah. Plus, some nice, cool sunny weather (which I did not take advantage of enough) and another family squabble. Ugh! I have to feel good to write, to be creative. I guess you know exactly what I mean?

    And, when I am writing, I am also taking pics or finding them online, doing a little research, hyper-focused on the task in front of me, on the computer screen… not other things at all. Dishes pile up, laundry gets ignored, weeds grow in the yard. It’s always been that way.

    I just love the photos of your property – the barn is awesome! If it were haunted, what a post! Maybe you can invent a scary, haunted barn story for us? For me? I am a farm girl without a farm. Those sunrises and the expanse of land (which also isolates you) is still so awe inspiring! Of course, I think you are lucky. But when we are down, we ladies (term used loosely here…) need real physical companionship, in front of us. We need faces and voices and a shared meal. I got to see some women and friends face to face to help me not sink this past week. Now, I feel fortified, and hope to write again.

    Our blogging relationships can be a great help, and expressing ourselves is important to some of us… but I can see where such a wide expanse of landscape can be prohibitive and isolating. I’m hoping you can get what you need soon… (Vrooom…wheels and a current license to peel out of there when wanted!)

    1. Howdy Honey!
      “..start the day with histerical, maniacal laughter..” That’s too funny!
      Well, you’re my first comment (maybe my only one), and the last one I’m going to answer till much later. I’m taking my own advice and getting off of here in a few. I might even ‘push’ myself away and take a breather for a few days. I understand exactly what you were saying, and that was the point I was trying to make. If I spend my entire morning and part of my afternoon on this blog trying to play catch-up, and the rest of the time trying to ‘hurry up’ and get my household chores done before the Old Man gets home, I have no time to do anything else. If I do the ‘anything else’ first, housework piles up…and I hate a dirty house. Evening is not good for me. My ‘me’ time has to be when he’s not home.
      Ah, family squabbles; aren’t those just gem moments that you look forward to? There’s a whole shit-load of us, most are women, and I had to separate from the pack to rid myself of the pushy advice, gossip, and overall drama. I found being labeled the ‘loner’ to be a far cry better than the alternative.
      Ours is just a dusty, old acreage, but I’ve grown quite fond of it. I’m a midwesterner, so cornfields are right up my alley, and I could look at the view forever. I’ll have to take more barn pics. Trust me. The one I took don’t do the damn thing justice. It’s pretty rundown and creepy.
      We took my car to the shop, but I decided not to have them work on it, because I thought they were trying to screw me with the quote of over $500 they gave me. Doug went and picked up the part and is going to try and fix it himself this coming weekend, so cross your fingers and toes. He can be handy when he wants to be, so I’m gonna put my faith in him. It’s a ‘huge’ step that he’s willing to do this, but then I’ve been a bear to live with lately. I think he understands now just how important it is for me to have some kind of a social life, that I’m getting real antsy about it, and his time is limited if something doesn’t change soon. It gives him incentive.
      I’m glad you got a chance to spend some time with friends and push past the drearies. There is nothing worse for a writer than being depressed and unable to write. It sucks! Make sure you keep your priorities straight though. I’m trying to tackle that problem myself right now. I’ll know I’m successful when I can breathe a bit more easily and not be so frustrated. I’m trying to let my gut guide me.

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