Happy New Year Kids!

I thought I’d better drop in and leave a post before everyone thinks I’ve fallen off the face of the earth. As you can see no such thing has happened. Pissy has just been busy living her life. I did get my ass chewed recently by my daughter, Jessie, and Halloween Kristy (I’ve now dubbed her, so there’s no confusion as to whom I’m speaking about) though, so that twisted my arm a bit too. Anyway, I’m here, ready to get down to business, so let’s stir up a little dust in the litterbox, shall we? 🙂

The New Year is close enough in my neck of the woods that I can almost feel Father Time reaching out to take hold of my hand as he guides me through the membrane from this year to the next. Twenty nine minutes away to be exact. How is Pissy bringing in the New Year? My being a woman who lives on the edge and all…Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, ((snort)) Ha, Ha….well, while the majority are out dressed in their finery swilling cocktails with their partners, friends and/or family, and awaiting the moment at the stroke of midnight when they can make senseless music with their noisemakers, I’m sitting here with all of you. The festive attire I don is my husband’s long johns that are slightly yellowed from hard water. I’ve taken great pains to make sure my hair is just so, and resembles a Pebbles Flintstone look while pony-tailed and piled on top of my head. Chilled champagne is much too racy for me this evening and I’ve settled for an icy glass of Squirt on my nightstand instead. Yep, I’m propped up in bed lounging on the most anticipated night of the year for partying; me, my new laptop, and all of you.

The Old Man and I had actually made plans but nixed them mid-week. I can’t get him to go out bar-hopping—as he claims it’s amateur night and isn’t going to deal with the cops and drunks—so we thought instead we’d put together a little something at the homestead with just a few friends. That had been our original plan, but then I pulled something in my back. This, after dealing with my 18 year old son who has been in crisis mode after a breakup with his girl, and the lab puppies I now refer to as my ‘Children of the Corn’, was a bit too much and I knew I wasn’t up to entertaining. Even after we were invited elsewhere, but opted instead to stay home. Funny, but I can’t say I’m too disappointed. Tomorrow morning there are going to be a lot of miserable people out there: Most will be hung-over. Some will be sitting in jail. Still others will be waking up with someone they can’t remember even going home with. I’m speaking from personal experience. Been there, done that, and can’t say I enjoyed any of those after-party mornings. I, on the other hand, will greet the brand new year with a clear head, lying between warm, soft, fleece sheets, next to my long-haired, tattooed, white, biker-trash husband. I’ll take this over the other any day.

I wonder if this means I’m finally growing up. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I’ve always considered ‘adult’ to be a dirty word. Being an adult means you can’t do dumb shit, make an ass out of yourself, and get away with it. Being an adult means uptight, responsible, practical, and boring as hell. Being an adult means you’re even closer to taking a dirt nap then you were before…and I’ve always intended to live forever! So am I growing up? Nahhhhh! I think I’m just pooped and getting my second wind. As long as the spirit is willing…

I’ve got too many plans this next year to grow up now. I’m promising myself to start an exercise regimen, lose ten pounds, tone up that muffin top, and get back into that damn bikini that’s been slumbering in the back of my drawer for the last few years. I’ve got the Old Man’s birthday to look forward to in a few weeks, and fully intend to ‘tear it up’ with him. Then there’s Spring and Summer that always brings with it too many warm afternoons and evenings accompanied by cold beer. I also have that fiftieth birthday coming up next November that Pandora Patty and I intend to celebrate the last week of October in Salem, Massachusetts. I have a book to finish, that who knows…could actually prove to push me forward and out of my comfort zone here in the sticks. I got too much on my plate; too much fun to look forward to that I need to steer clear of adulthood for yet a little while longer. My wish for all of you is that you can dodge that bullet also.

Well, “Happy New Year’ all. I hope 2012 brings you the kind of life you want, the happiness you deserve, and love without limits. Always remember YOU are the greatest love, the most important person, and the best friend that YOU will ever have. Honor and respect yourself. I love you all.